Having a baby changes just about everything in your life and can even take a toll on your relationship. Sometimes we get too caught up in being parents that we forget how to be a couple too.
Here are some tips to help keep that spark in your relationship after having a baby:
Recognize that this is hard for both of you
Instead of assuming it is only hard for you, try to see your partners point of view and how they feel as hell. This is new and hard for both of you, talking about how you mutually are learning how to be parents can strengthen your relationship.
Set aside time to work on difficulties
Weekly check ins. You will both be more open to seeking resolutions rather than just spewing grievances. Make it a point to ask how the other is feeling and where and how you can improve on the areas you are lacking in. There is always room for improvement and making sure you communicate effectively is so important rather than bottling up your emotions which usually will burst through in an argument.
When you do choose to talk, talk effectively
Expressing your anger and frustration in a way that doesn't cause your partner to feel defensive isn't easy. Try saying, “ I am really o overwhelmed and could use some help with the baby right now” instead go, “ You don’t help me!”. Being completely open about your feelings and laying them right out on the table will save you so many arguments or tension. Be open and honest with your partner so they don’t have to read in between the lines and know how they can better assist you while also understanding your emotions.
Find time to connect
The most important ingredient is intimacy to staying connected. Binge watch your favorite shows and movies, cook together, cuddle, snuggle, hugs, etc. Keep dating each other and flirting with one another to keep that intimacy flowing in constantly.
Take what you need from this read, leave what doesn't resonate. Relationships are hard on their own and can change and feel more difficult after having a baby. This is your reminder that this new journey of parenthood could be hard for the both of you and be a sign that you should step back and date again. I hope you found this helpful. If so, leave a comment and share with a friend who could benefit from this read.